You may remember 16 year old Turkish girl, Ayten Ahmet (now 17) from around this time last year.

She was subject to some idiotic comments made by Melbourne cleric Sheik Mohammed Omran and Islamic leader Yasser Soliman when she decided to enter the Miss Teen Australia pageant in 2006.  They called her desire to pursue a modeling career a 'slur on Islam' amongst other pointlessly hurtful phrases which attribute far more influence to her than she could possibly have.

Ridiculous as their comments were, they were good for her publicity.  It seems nobody has heard anything about her since she was dropped from the competition after making it into the top 26, which is a real shame as she seemed like a bright young woman with plenty of support from her parents.

So I ask:

Whatever happened to Ayten Ahmet?

Did anyone end up signing her as a model?  Were they put off by the bad press?  I would have thought that (particularly) Turkish business owners would gladly snap her up to be the face of their promotional campaign, since most of the world's Muslims are not fundies, you'd think that'd generate some sales as well as having a positive effect on Muslim girls who might otherwise be too afraid to follow their hearts for fear of similar baseless persecution.  Sure that would politicise their advertising a little, but isn't that the trick to getting free airtime?

Everyone googles themselves these days, so I hope Ayten (or indeed someone else with a clue) digs this up at some point and fills us in on how she's doing.  I would hate to think that some crusty old misogynists buried her aspirations.

Nursing is one of those occupations that only genuinely good people enter.  If you think about what nurses do all day, it's easy to understand why you might occasionally meet a surly one.  In fact, it's difficult to understand why they're not all surly.

We're all terrible company when we're sick, and even worse when we can't take care of ourselves.  Imagine having to work all kinds of hours and endure whining and belligerent patients who soil themselves then blame it on you.  Now imagine having to do it for less money than is offered in the next state.

Victorian Division 1 nurses with seven years experience earn $52,000pa, as compared with $61,000pa in New South Wales.  Given the work is the same, there's little excuse for such a discrepancy in the pay scale.

So, once again Victorian public nurses are preparing for industrial action, in an effort to equalise their wages.  They're asking for a 6% annual hike over 3 years and an improvement to nurse:patient ratios, whereas the state government is only prepared to offer 3.25% with no additional relief.

I'm curious about the hundreds of additional nurses Steve Bracks promised.  Were they all swallowed up by that moronic Nurse on Call initiative?  Clearly that exists only to inexpensively bolster the raw statistics of nurses in Victoria, without actually providing any relief to triage.

Now Bracks' replacement John Brumby in his infinite wisdom, wants to make nursing wages performance based, as they are for police.  The eight hundred additional police promised by Bracks have apparently all gone into revenue-raising where it's easy for them to earn their pay rise by dialling-down the tolerance of their radar guns.

I'm a little perplexed as to how one would implement this performance-based wage incentive for nurses, though.  Certainly every patient being treated must be attended to adequately.  So how then do you ask nurses to increase their outcomes beyond 100%?

Clearly crime doesn't work the same way.  Policing is a 'best effort' system where a certain percentage of crimes go unaddressed, so performance-based incentives actually mean something.  You can't really compare that to nursing, can you?...  Unless of course nurses are expected to shake down patients who don't heal quickly enough.

The battle over wages is a public relations nightmare for nurses.  If they strike, or reduce their efforts then they're vilified for 'selfishly' causing additional delays for the sake of a few measly dollars.  However it's obvious that if they aren't prepared to stick to their guns and pressure the government, they'll never be taken seriously.

If we want our quality of care to improve in this state then we have to pay fair wages, and staff hospitals adequately.  Since our goal should not be to play catch-up, but rather to put the rest of Australia to shame, then we must match the wages offered in New South Wales.  Since the cost of living is a bit lower in Victoria, this should yield a measure of fairness in favour of our nurses and attract more people to an otherwise very unattractive vocation.

The morons at Ten News have put to air a story about MySpace taking some token PR steps to increase the safety of kids on their service.  Basically it was a fluff-piece for MySpace, helping them address the PR concerns which have been plaguing them precisely because mainstream media has blown everything out of proportion in the first place.

Anyway, at the conclusion of this story, they displayed a set of safety tips which they encouraged MySpace users to adopt for peace of mind.  It really underscores how clueless these people are about the reality of online safety.

• Set profile to private

  Yes, that's right, to make effective use of this social networking website, make it so nobody can see your page.

• Don't reveal personal details

  Here's a new one.  This one is almost legitimate, except that you've already set it so nobody can see your page, so what's the problem with putting your phone number on it?

• Conceal "online now" status

  When using the world's biggest social network, don't let anyone know you're there!  Social sites are more fun when people wonder why you're not there.

• Block other users

  If by chance, with your profile and online status hidden, someone happens to still discover that you exist, block them immediately!

• Only accept known friends

  What a horror it would be to converse with people you've never met in person.  How awful it would be for you to engage in a discussion with people in other countries.  Clearly the Internet exists only for communication with your neighbours.  To be safe, you should avoid other cultures at all costs!

They're stupid.  There's nothing in these tips which helps kids make effective use of the service safely.  The biggest threat to youth safety online is their overwhelming desire to expose themselves as much as possible.  These tips are all about unplugging the PC, which ensures they'll be ignored.

Instead of placating terminally ignorant parents, they should be teaching kids how to stay anonymous while exposing their personality.  After all, it's only the stalkers who care what your phone number is, or which school you attend.  None of that helps anyone get to know you, so refusing to share that kind of information doesn't detract from the experience.  That's the message to be drumming into them.

One look at Mark Holden should reveal that this man's idea of good taste leaves a lot to be desired.  Here's a 53 year old man who speaks like Ned Flanders and goes well out of his way to pretend he's still twenty-something and cool.  I'm not sure exactly in which decade he stopped being cool, but I can tell you it was long before the word 'hip' went out of fashion.

He's had a lot of success which is respectable, though he's had it in the music industry which despite all the purists, more often celebrates resounding mediocrity than genuine talent.  Unfortunately the largest consumers of music are people whose brains are not yet fully developed.  This isn't Mark's fault of course, but it goes a long way to explaining why he -- with his obvious taste challenges -- has been able to forge himself a career.

He takes every opportunity to mention his biggest source of pride: writing uninspired songs like Absolutely Everybody (which has the lyrical depth of a fortune cookie) and Shine, then arranging them in the shape of dry dog turd, and passing them off to a young Vanessa Amorosi to wear as a permanent blight on her career.  The poor girl hid under her bed for years waiting for her contract with Holden to expire, and when it did (in 2006) she bolted, and is now performing some decidedly passable music.  Honestly how good can you really be if a relative nobody like Amorosi outgrows you after less than a fifth of her contract period?

I have been with my previous management for seven years and thought both parties had gone as far as we could together. Moving over to Ralph Carr Management seemed like a natural progression, given the acts he has successfully managed.

So with all this mediocrity behind him, it surprises me how seriously he's taken as a judge by Australian Idol audiences.  His plagiarised 'touchdown' trademark has been misapplied more often than not, with the most notable exception being Jessica Mauboy's performance of Christina Aguilera's 'Beautiful' which you'd have to be dead not to have enjoyed.

Most recently his somewhat creepy enthusiastic appreciation has been focused on 16 year old Idol hopeful Matt Corby, whose biggest talent is looking pretty.  This kid is assured Idol success because of his appeal to the dribbling crotches of the screaming and voting public, that's understood, but what surprises me is just how much praise Holden is heaping on him.

There's no denying Matt has a decent singing voice, but he's definitely being allowed to skate on his extremely poor breathing, underwhelming song interpretation and utter lack of microphone skills.  The popping and prolonged exhaling into the mic is so severe that it overwhelms rest of the mix in spite of all the hardware designed to filter it.

Someone needs to tell this kid that it's OK if his lips aren't flapping all the time during a song.  It's perfectly fine to have a couple of seconds of BVs or instruments without feeling compelled to fill that space with 'yeahhh' or 'wooOO'.  Matt could be worthwhile someday, but he has a lot of learning to do.

Interestingly Mark Holden is broken record when it comes to harsh criticism of contestants who miss the emotional mark in their song delivery, but not with Matty.  This kid delivers songs with the emotional depth of a toothpaste commercial -- something which Holden is prepared to ignore if it means he has a shot at cashing in on his looks.

I think there's a good chance Holden is using the show to woo the kid should he fail to land a contract with Sony BMG.  I really hope he gets a chance to talk to Vanessa Amorosi before signing any long term contracts.

Glen Ridge blows.  'nuff said.