Touch Lamps

I completely understand Joe Inventor using a light bulb to test his new capacitance switching mechanism, but thats where the marriage between light bulb and touch switch should have ended.

In the real world, touch lamps are worse than useless. The problem isn't the touch sensitivity technology really, it's the choice to implement a 3-stage dimming process. Now, instead of flicking a switch to turn your light on and off, you have to tap the fucking thing repeatedly to achieve the same result... and far be it from us to use such stone-age methods of setting our desired brightness as, lets say, inserting a bulb of suitable wattage.

Certainly it's feasible that someone out there appreciates this dimming function, but then why make it work the wrong way around? It doesn't make any sense for a bedside lamp to start off dim and increase in brightness the more you touch it. After quite some time (hopefully) of reading your book or fondling your loved one with your stupid bloody touch lamp set to 'mood light', to switch it off you have to tap it up to 'omg hangover' and then again to 'retina searing' before finally punching the thing off your partner's nightstand (because you wouldn't be stupid enough to own one of these things, I hope).

It seems clear to me that even the inventors of these lamps didn't use them, because if they did, they'd soon realise just how stupid they are. They'd be a little less annoying if the dimming function were reversed thereby following your natural descent into sleep, but I think they're ultimately best left in the 70s where they belong.